The Specific Rim

I had a wonderfully amazing plan to save myself time and money. With the ever threatening approach of what I call "Hell on Earth" and others refer to as "winter". I planned to purchase a new set of rims as well as a new set of snow tires that I could easily install by myself. Hence sparing me the expense and anguish of getting an appointment at the tire shop to have them switch over my tires from "All Season" to "Winter" tires. With the weather turning slighty uglier with every passing day, people begin to form long lines in order to have someone put "Winter" tires on their cars for them. I was going to bypass this insanity this year.
This morning, I set out on my quest. First, I found a place that had a sale on Snow Tires. They also happened to be having a huge sale on rims as well. Jackpot!
I told the young man behind the counter what size tires I had on the car at the moment and I also gave him the year, make and model of my car. He joyfully looked at the computer screen in front of him and then instantly began to frown. "We don't have any of those in stock" he mumbled to me. I turned to look at the huge pile of rims, stacked upon palettes, stacked upon more rims and palettes.
"None of those will fit?" I queried.
"Nope" was the reply. But I could order some in for you if you want" were the words that he stabbed into my head as I stood there motionless and emotionless.
"No thanks. I'll look around" I said. And I left.
I then got into my little North American domestic car, and continued my journey of discovery.
I stopped in a big parking lot, in front of a big store, with a big sign that read "The right parts, the right people, the right price" Ahh-haaah! Eldorado!
I scurried my little self, out of my little car, and entered the big, big store. I stood in the big line and patiently waited for my big chance to approach the big counter. When I finally got there, I asked my big question. Do you have rims for a 2004 Dodge SX 2.0?"
"Like a Neon?" he asked or answered to my question.
"Yup" I replied.
"We don't sell rims here" he quipped.
I looked around the big big store. "Rims are parts." I exclaimed. "Parts of the car." I continued.
"Not really" said the guy behind the big counter.
"Not really?" I thought to myself. "They're one of the most important parts of the car to make it move along the road" my head voice continued.
"You may want to try blah, blah, blah... " is what I heard when I headed toward the big exit doors.
I got into my little Neon err I mean SX 2.0 and headed to my next encounter with destiny or rather density.
Place of last resort. Gulp. W-Mart. I hate that place. I hate the feel of it, the look of it, the smell of it. Especially the zombie people that drag themselves around the place looking for the best deal on potato chips or shoe polish or whatever. But hey, they do have a lot of stuff and maybe, just maybe, they have what I need today.
Off to the counter to wait to ask a question. "Do you have yadda, yadda, yadda"
"Yes we do" was the reply.
"HALLELUJAH!" went the choir in my head.
"If you could throw some snow tires on them for me, I would be forever in your debt" I told the young lady behind the counter.
She looked on yet another computer screen and her face went blank.
"We don't have any winter tires for that size. But we do have All Seasons"
"Sigh" in my head. And probably out loud too.
"Never mind, I'll just take the rims. At least I'm half way there now"
I pay for the rims and with a renewed determination, I walk back out to my little car.
Of course, me always being the quick thinker, I figure that I better take these rims out of the box and check them against the ones on the car to see how they compare in look and size.
I look at the brand new shiny rim. I look at one of the front rims on the car. I look again at the nice new shiny rim. I look again at the front rim on the car.
Hmmmm.. four holes in the nice new shiny rim. Yup, five holes on the front rim of the car.
Turn around, cart the rims back into Wally World, back to the automotive counter. Now there are 4 people waiting there as well. I slump against the shopping cart as I wait my turn.
I finally get to the counter. "These won't work" "Wrong number of holes" I slur.
"Oh dear" was the response. "You will have to go to Customer Service" for a return or refund"
OMG!!! Where is a flame thrower when you need one?
10 minute wait in Custer Disservice. Back to my little car.
I beeline it to the nearest Tim Horton's and drown my sorrow in caffeine and 35% MF cream.
You win this time fate. But the next time that I am heading down the road and I spot a Neon with Snow tires parked somewhere, the cinder blocks and jack will be put to good use, and you shall be defeated. You can unleash your vengeance on that other Neon or rather SX 2.0 owner.
VICTORY IS MINE!!! Though I will never get those 2 hours of my life back. (sigh)